Shared Wings
Ever since Cas had expressed deep disappointment about Dean not being able to experience his true form or hear his true voice, it had been weighing on Dean. Not because he was not enough, or faulty, or somehow not the Righteous Man Cas had always trusted him to be. It was more personal. Selfish. Greedy. He wanted to see Cas in all his mighty glory, but there just wasn't any way to accomplish that, unless he wanted to have his eyes blackened and burnt out of their sockets. The thought alone made him shiver. He valued his eyesight pretty highly. It had saved him from many a trouble, and would preferably continue to keep his peepers intact, thank you very much.But the yearning was still there; Dean may have Cas in his bed, as his lover, as his confidant, as his life partner, but that wasn't all of Cas. It was the human form, and the knowledge there was infinitely more to him was eating Dean alive in moments he forgot to not think so very deeply.So the morning Dean woke up unreasonably warm with an unfamiliar weight on him, it was really something very hard to wrap his brain around. Confused, slowly, drowsily, not quite in the world of the conscious before coffee, Dean turned his face to look at Cas, the angel’s features relaxed against the pillow, slumbering in his boxers, leg thrown over Dean’s hip and arm and feathers flung over Dean.Carefully, Dean inspected the situation, not really comprehending what he was seeing and feeling, but there were actual, black feathers covering Cas's shoulder, extending over to cover Dean’s torso, which actually explained the cosy warmth.Somehow, during the dead of night, Cas had sprouted wings.Technically, Dean knew full well he'd always had them, like all angels did, but Dean had never seen an angel’s wings unless they were scorched on the ground, or a mere intimidating shadow on a wall.But Cas’s wings were corporeal. These were real wings, soft wings, under which Dean was loath to get out from under, and reached out a gentle hand to smooth the feathers . It was truly astonishing, the deep black color shimmering even in the meagre light streaming from the vent on the door to their room, the way Dean's fingers glided over the feathers without any resistance at all. Like silk, like the smoothest satin imaginable.Dean took in the sight of the wing as it drooped over Dean and the side of the bed, and spilled on the floor, the tips stopping just shy of the wall. These things were massive.Suddenly Dean was wide awake. He was pretty, almost, maybe, sure that this wasn't a dream, and the morning-rough voice right next to him confirmed his suspicions; “I knew the day wouldn't be far now,” Cas said as softly as his gravelly just-woken-up voice allowed, stretching his wing the best he could in the room too small for stretching, well… Huge wings. Castiel covered over half of Dean's body again, down to his knees and looked Dean in the eye with solemnity and love. “You've been exposed to my grace for so long, it was bound to have this effect some time soon. It's not all that I am, but if you can see and touch my wings, one day you will be able to see the rest of me… If you'll have me.”Dean fanned his fingers and slid them between Cas's feathers carefully, afraid he might hurt Cas, and thought, astounded and hard about what Cas was offering.There was such sincerity in Cas's words. Such an offer of something so grand it seemed immeasurable, and it was something that was going to be only for Dean. It left Dean speechless, mulling over the enormity of the situation, fingers playing with Cas’s feathers a bit more, letting them slide between his fingers, and judging by the indulgent smile on Cas's face, it must've felt good for him too.Dean felt overwhelmed, like something had clicked into place, like there was something more between them now, growing. Something permanent that no one could ever take away. Dean wasn't sure he was worth it.There had been so many lies, so much deception in their past, from both sides, and it had takena lot of work to find a place where they could trust each other implicitly,unquestionably. So when Castiel offered the one thing Dean desired the most, he wasn't sure he was ready for it. And absolutely not without giving something in return.“This is...” Dean swallowed hard, throat clicking dry. “I don’t think I deserve this,” he said quietly, shyly, never letting go of Cas’s feathers, never wanting to letgo. “I have nothing to give you. Nothing of significance.”“Dean,” Cas shifted to lean on his elbow to look Dean straight in the face, his eyes glowing slightly with his grace. It told Dean Cas was being pretty fucking serious.Cas cupped Dean’s face gently, thumb brushing constrict circled on his cheek. “I've held your soul in my hands, Dean Winchester. I've stitched it back together from ragged tatters, and you took that patchwork and made it into something even more beautiful. That's what you have given me. Your unconditional love. There’s nothing more I could want from you. You’ve already given me everything.”Cas's eyes flashed brighter before turning back to the ocean blue which Dean loved to drown in. “I love you, Dean, and if I am finally capable of giving you something you’ve wanted for so long, it’s the least I can do in return. It’ll take time, but we’ll get there.”Dean felt a weird sensation when some feathers on the underside of Cas’s wing moved and caressed his chest, leaving goosebumps in their wake.Dean hadn't stopped stroking Cas's wings, but he raised his brow in question, and Cas smirked playfully. “Those are my alulas. Wing fingers, if you may. There’s much I can do with them.” The strange wing-fingers pressed a little harder to Dean’s skin, giving him a taste of their strength. But before he got too carried away, he focused at the situation at hand.Deep in thought, enjoying the caresses, Dean’s thoughts slotted into place, and after a long silence, he finally turned to his side under Cas’s wing, wrapping an arm around Cas and cupping the joining of Cas’s wing on his shoulder blade. Gently guiding Cas to turn over onto his back, and marvelling at the shift of the silky feathers brushing against his bare skin. His determination to kiss the angel stupid was interrupted when he saw the apprehensive look on Cas’s face.“Dean,” Cas asked after a pause, looking away. “Do you think I deserve this? Considering all my wrongdoings, do you think I'm worthy of the happiness you give me?”Dean had no words. He had nothing but himself, and Castiel had made it clear that was plenty, so Dean got to showing Cas just how completely he belonged to Cas. When Cas got despondent and was in danger of falling in the pit of regret over things that were in the past, there was only one thing that would suffice as a response to that;Dean manoeuvred himself on top of Cas, his wings instantly wrapping around him together with his arms, mouth opening in invitation. Slowly, thoroughly, Dean poured every last ounce of his acceptance into the languid kiss that could have lasted minutes or hours, but neither of them cared about time passing. All that mattered was this moment.They stayed like that until they both knew with absolute certainty that their questions had been answered, when they found love in each other's eyes.The rest of the morning was spent in quiet awe on Deans part, and pleasurable relaxation when it came to Cas, since Dean insisted on sitting on the back of Cas’s thighs and sweeping his fingers in Cas's wings, massaging joints and even finding a ticklish spot right under the left wing. Occasionally Dean buried his face into the feathers, inhaling deep and delighting in the fact that they smelled just like Cas.Dean could've sworn there was something sexy going on when Cas groaned deeply and moaned Dean's name, low and blissed out, but that path was to be pursued another time.Right now Dean was too emotional, too busy enjoying the fact that he had Castiel all to himself, wings and all. Dean’s everything.It was well past midday once they finally emerged into the kitchen, Cas had tucked his wings back to another dimension and was on a mission to find coffee, raiding the kitchen with Dean ravenous for bacon and eggs.Sam looked at the pair suspiciously as he came to see what the commotion and highly uncharacteristic noises that could only be described as giggles were all about, taking in their dishevelled appearances and brightly flushed cheeks, and both Cas and Dean did their best to ignore Sam's raised Spanish inquisition brow.***
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